Patent Pending – the Poop Snoop

Oh man, so we can never tell whether our son, Mr. Pants, isn’t napping because he’s a crackhead, or because he has a dirty diaper. We of course know he’s a crackhead, but there’s really no way of telling (without entering his room) whether he has pooped.

What’s more, his crib seems to act as some sort of magical laxative. Whenever you plop him down in there, he in turn plops one down in there . (For me it’s always been libraries and, by extension, book stores. TMI?)

So The Wife is perpetually hopeful that some evil genius will invent the Poop Snoop. The device would be placed beneath the crib, then send a signal to a remote monitor when the doo-doo is detected. Easy, right? I be like: There’s an app for crap.

The Poop Snoop’s inevitable inventor will have to watch out for certain pitfalls, like false positives owing to gassy babies, neglected Diaper Genies, and incontinent great-grandparents. That said, I see broader applications, like in nursing homes, hospitals, and roller-coasters.

Bonus: whereas most of her million-dollar ideas are contingent on royalties, The Wife is offering up this gem gratis. I’ll open it up to insights, tweaks and, hopefully, suggestions for a catchier name.

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2 Responses to Patent Pending – the Poop Snoop

  1. Michele April 18, 2013 at 8:36 pm #

    How did I miss this the first time? I’m laughing so hard I might actually go into labor. OMG- too funny!

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  1. Postcards From The Hedge | Daddy Confidential - April 18, 2013

    […] blog was proposing ideas for semi-serious kids products. In one widely ignored post, I offered the Poop Snoop for detecting dirty diapers. I think even my mom didn’t read […]

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