Once in awhile, a product comes along that is so well designed, so perfectly suited to its purpose, yet so simple in its execution, that the world sits up and takes notice. That product, is Astroglide. But since this blog is ostensibly about fatherhood, I will focus instead on Boogie Wipes®.
For reasons not entirely clear, my son energetically resists all attempts to wipe his nose, face, and hands. Until he is old enough to understand verbal threats, I am stuck with deception, misdirection, and ambush. To the casual observer it probably appears I am smothering my son with a cloth soaked in chloroform. Fortunately, we have Boogie Wipes: disposable saline wipes that come in four mercifully mild scents.
These are the wipes you have been searching for. They gently and effectively clean sticky hands and runny noses. When used on the latter, the saline actually helps dissolve mucus. The ingredients are all benign, so there’s no off-putting chemical irritant.* I’m partial to grape. If they’re not already in your arsenal, get one of each scent. Your wife will marvel at your keen discernment. You, in turn, will feign obliviousness with a light shrug, then mutter something about how these wipes looked good.
My only concern is that Boogie Wipes are so awesome, it wouldn’t surprise me if they became victims of their own success. The company was started by two Oregon based “mompreneurs,” as they call themselves. (If that attempted pun makes you yak, may I recommend you daub the corners of your mouth with a menthol Boogie Wipe?) I could easily see them selling out to Johnson & Johnson or Dow Chemical, changing the formula, and succumbing to suckitude. Isn’t that how it always goes with perfect products? Until that day, I’ma stock me up on some Boogie Wipes.
* Note that while Boogie Wipes rock the casbah, they do not sanitize. For that you’ll need a more chemically infused wipe.