Tag Archives | joke

The Joke’s On Me

March 29, 2013

Oh man. Why is it that women cannot tell jokes? My best guess is that the risqué nature of many jokes has kept them the province of men. But few qualities are as attractive in a chick as the unexpected ability to tell a ripsnorter.

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Dad, Interrupted

March 14, 2013

Oh man. Have I seriously not blogged since October? Time to power up the defibrillator and revive Daddy Confidential – if only to satisfy the persistent pleadings of my loyal fan.

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Call Me Ishmael, Part Deux

May 25, 2012

Did you know the Social Security Administration tabulates data for the most popular names given to twins? People have a tendency to get cutesy with twins, as though the right names might clinch that audition for the Doublemint gum commercial.

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Recipe For A Bris Kit

April 17, 2012

The first mohel we contacted – the one we really wanted – rejected us. His name was Dr. Diamond, from New York Magazine’s short list of recommended mohels (motto: Nothing Cuts Like a Diamond). He was described as serving the “metropolitan area,” which I presumed included the metropolis. But when I called him from the maternity ward, Dr. Diamond sounded reluctant to make the drive from Long Island to Tribeca. Harsh.

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Watch Your Language

March 13, 2012

At 20 months, my son Fox is exhibiting some scandalous baby-talk. No joke: if you point to a wall clock he snappily supplies the word “cock.” We recently bought some pussy willows, the first two syllables of which Fox says flawlessly.

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Making The Cut

February 14, 2012

Oh man. People get so snippy on the topic of circumcision. I personally don’t understand why there’s such a big flap. It’s binary after all: your foreskin is either on or off, and it doesn’t particularly matter which.

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I Saw the Sign

November 18, 2011

Oh man. Months ago we got our son a DVD that’s supposed to teach him American Sign Language (ASL). Apparently babies can learn to communicate using sign language well before they can speak. At least that’s the premise of Baby Signing Time, the wildly popular…

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Spouting Off

October 7, 2011

The Wife and I have put in place a system for acquiring child-safety products. It is wondrously effective yet so simple that I would be remiss not to share it with you here. We first make a careful assessment of impending household dangers. This often includes receiving a crucial email from a concerned grandparent who has just read a cautionary article about a newly documented hazard, like babies choking on oven mitts.

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